Episode 515
Morning 6-Pack - Six Hilarious New Names for Artificial Intelligence (I couldn't help it)
I count down six better names for artificial intelligence after Trump floated renaming it — because apparently renaming rivers wasn’t enough. I say “artificial intelligence” is a weird combo: “artificial” sounds fake and “intelligence” sounds human, so it’s all mixed messages. We even asked AI for suggestions like Digital Intelligence and Synthetic Reasoning, but those felt kinda boring, so I whipped up my own goofy branding. The whole bit is fast, snarky, and definitely morning-radio silly — think quick jokes, puns, and me doing branding on the fly. I won’t give away the top pick here though — you’ll have to listen for the crown jewel and my plea to not get offed by it.
Takeaways:
- I said AI is a dumb name — sounds fake and also too human, we roasted it.
- We joked about Trump wanting "Supreme Intelligence" — sounds like a soda flavor, lol.
- I explained modern AI is mainly advanced statistical pattern matching and prediction, not human understanding.
- We ran through funny rebrands — Brainy McBrain Face, Crunchwrap, Know-It-All, Future Overlord — pure chaos.
- I reminded folks branding matters; honest names like "engineered intelligence" are accurate but boring, so we meme'd it.
Transcript
It's haystack.
Speaker A:And I suppose renaming bodies of water was not enough.
Speaker A:Now President Trump thinks that artificial intelligence needs a better name.
Speaker A:Said something over the weekend about it said that artificial intelligence is a.
Speaker A:Is a terrible name for it suggested superior intelligence, extreme intelligence, Supreme Intelligence, Supreme Intelligence.
Speaker A:I don't know, those sound more like Mountain Dew flavors than computer science.
Speaker A:Try the new Extreme Intelligence now with twice the reasoning and 80 grams of sugar.
Speaker A:I don't know.
Speaker A:To be honest though, the funny part is I think he's kind of got a little bit of a point.
Speaker A:I always thought it was a terrible term myself.
Speaker A:I mean, artificial intelligence is kind of a weird pairing of words.
Speaker A:Artificial sounds fake and intelligence.
Speaker A:Sounds like this thing genuinely understands everything the way a human does, which is clearly not right either.
Speaker A:I mean, a lot of what modern AI does is incredibly advanced pattern recognition as well as prediction, language generation and reasoning.
Speaker A:But advanced statistical pattern matching with occasional hallucinations is too long for the logo, I guess.
Speaker A:So I actually asked artificial intelligence what AI should be called and some of the suggestions included Digital Intelligence, Synthetic reasoning, which is probably my favorite machine pattern recognition, and engineered intelligence.
Speaker A:That's also accurate.
Speaker A:But those, those are all fairly accurate, but they're also kind of boring.
Speaker A:And in the modern world, brand names matter.
Speaker A:So as a guy that's done a little bit of branding, I decided to come up with some better options.
Speaker A:Because if we're going to rename this thing, let's at least be honest about the relationship.
Speaker A:I can come up with at least six better names for artificial intellig.
Speaker B:Well, gather round folks.
Speaker B:It's the time of day when we laugh and smile in a light hearted way.
Speaker B:Tune in for the giggles and let's kick back.
Speaker B:Here comes the phone.
Speaker B:It's the morning six pack the top.
Speaker A:Six better names for artificial intelligence number six, brainy McBrain face number five, professor pulled it out your.
Speaker A:Oh, easy.
Speaker A:Number four, crunchwrap.
Speaker A:Supreme intelligence number three, that thing everyone uses to cheat.
Speaker A:Number two.
Speaker A:Know it all, cyber virgin.
Speaker A:And the number one better name for artificial intelligence is, of course, Future Overlord.
Speaker A:Please don't kill me first.
Speaker A:I did what you said.
Speaker A:Over Overlords.
