Episode 53
Guess What? The iPhone’s on Ozempic!
Whoa, did you hear about the iPhone 17? Apparently, it’s just the iPhone 16 with a fresh coat of paint and a camera that might be 0.0001% better—woohoo! And guess what? It's still gonna cost ya an arm and a leg, probably more than your last used car. But wait, there’s an iPhone Air, folks! It’s so thin, it could slip right through your fingers like a soggy french fry. Plus, it’s got a titanium frame, meaning it’s tougher than your buddy who still thinks he can do a backflip at the age of 30. Tune in as we dive into all the quirks and laughs from Apple’s big reveal, so grab your snacks and let’s roll!
Apple just dropped the mic at their latest shindig, unveiling the iPhone 17! Spoiler alert: it’s basically the iPhone 16’s twin with a fresh coat of paint and a camera that might take slightly better selfies. Y’know, just in time for you to spend the price of a used car on it. What a steal, am I right? 😂 And here’s the juicy tidbit: apparently, this phone’s been hitting the Ozempic before the big reveal! But wait, there’s more! Say hello to the new iPhone Air, which is so thin, it’s practically a ghost! 👻 With a titanium frame that’s tougher than your toddler with a set of keys, it promises to be scratch-resistant and pocket-friendly—unless you’re wearing skinny jeans, then good luck with that! So, get ready to flex your new Air iPhone like it’s a designer handbag on a budget!
Takeaways:
- Apple's new iPhone 17 is basically the same as last year's model, just with a fresh coat!
- The iPhone Air is so thin, it practically floats away—no charging necessary, folks!
- If you thought iPhones were expensive, just wait till you see this year's price tag—yikes!
- They say this iPhone can survive a toddler with keys, which is honestly a miracle in itself!
- The new iPhone Air is so light, it might just disappear into thin air—POOF!
- Expect to see more folks pretending to have the iPhone Air—it’s that invisible!
Transcript
Apple held their big event yesterday to unveil the iPhone 17, which seems like is basically the iPhone 16 with a new paint job and maybe a slightly better camera.
Speaker A:But don't worry, it will still cost as much as a used car, and it was probably still assembled by a child in a factory somewhere.
Speaker A:The big news was that apparently the iPhone has been on ozempic.
Speaker A:There's a new iPhone model called iPhone air, which is thinner than my patients at the dmv.
Speaker A:It's got a titanium frame and they're claiming that it's got enough scratch resistance to survive a toddler with a set of keys.
Speaker A:So lots of folks are excited about the iPhone air.
Speaker A:Can't wait to get your hands on the all new iPhone air.
Speaker A:Act like you already did with the air iPhone.
Speaker B:Dude, check out my new iPhone.
Speaker B:That's just the palm of your hand.
Speaker A:Apple harnessed the technology of the air guitar to create the most affordable iPhone.
Speaker B:And check out how thin it is.
Speaker B:Yeah, it's so thin it's like you can't even see it.
Speaker A:The air iPhone fits effortlessly in your pocket and never needs charging.
Speaker B:Dude, get in here.
Speaker B:Let's take a selfie.
Speaker B:Yeah, I'd rather not.
Speaker B:Hold on, I'm getting a call.
Speaker B:Look, it's from Sydney sweeney.
Speaker B:Hey, babe, what's shaking?
Speaker B:Well, I guess if you're gonna just make stuff up.
Speaker A:The air iPhone.
Speaker A:Make a pretend appointment at a make believe apple store and get a free.
Speaker B:Pair of air airp.
