Episode 305
Bridesmaid Booted for Beauty? Say What?!
So, get this: a bride-to-be totally asked her bestie to step down as a bridesmaid 'cause her fiancé thought she was too hot! Like, seriously? Who gets fired from a gig they weren’t even paid for ‘cause they rolled a natural 20 in the looks department? We dive into this wild wedding drama and the absurdity of it all—who knew weddings could turn into such a reality show? We’re talking about a friendship crumbling over wedding pics, which is just bananas! Grab your snacks and get ready for some laughs as we unravel this juicy tale and more on today’s episode!
Takeaways:
- Can you believe a bride booted her bestie as a bridesmaid for being too hot?
- Getting kicked out of a wedding for your looks is a new level of crazy!
- Weddings: where friendships go to die, especially over who looks too good in pics!
- The real drama at weddings is deciding who’s too pretty to stand next to the bride.
- It's wild that a fiancé thought he could police beauty at his wedding!
- Forget the cake, everyone’s dying to know why Sarah's BFF is MIA from the party!
Transcript
It's haystack.
Speaker A:And a bride to be allegedly asked her lifelong best friend to step down as a bridesmaid because the fiance thought she was too attractive.
Speaker A:First of all, what a wild phone call.
Speaker A:Hey, I have some difficult news.
Speaker A:You're being removed from the wedding party.
Speaker A:Oh, no.
Speaker A:Did I do something wrong?
Speaker A:Oh, no, you're just.
Speaker A:You're doing a little too well.
Speaker A:I mean, can you imagine getting fired from a volunteer position for excessive attractiveness?
Speaker A:Most people get kicked out of weddings for starting drama, showing up late, getting too drunk, trying to fight a dj.
Speaker A:This woman got kicked out because she accidentally rolled a natural 20 in the genetics department.
Speaker A:And if you know what that means, you almost certainly did not roll a nat20 in the genetics department.
Speaker A:The explanation is amazing.
Speaker A:We're worried you'll draw attention away from the bride in the photos.
Speaker A:What?
Speaker A:Have you ever seen wedding photos?
Speaker A:Nobody's looking at the bridesmaid.
Speaker A:A wedding album is 400 pictures of the bride standing slightly different.
Speaker A:Here's the bride holding flowers.
Speaker A:Here's the bride not holding flowers.
Speaker A:Here's the bride looking left.
Speaker A:Here's the bride looking right.
Speaker A:Here's the bride pretending she didn't just spend the gross domestic product of a small nation on centerpieces.
Speaker A:I mean, bridesmaids are usually just standing there thinking, I paid $300 for this dress, and I'm never wearing it again.
Speaker A:And they did this, like, six weeks before the wedding.
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker A:That's kind of late.
Speaker A:I mean, at that point, you've bought the dress, you've made plans, you've spent the money.
Speaker A:And then the bride has the nerve to say, I still want you to come as a guest.
Speaker A:That's kind of a tough sell.
Speaker A:You can't be in the wedding party, but we'd love you to sit in the audience and watch.
Speaker A:Basically, she's saying, you're too attractive for the stage, but not for row seven.
Speaker A:What in the world?
Speaker A:And then, of course, the mutual friends split into camps.
Speaker A:Of course they do.
Speaker A:Because every wedding eventually becomes some geopolitical conflict.
Speaker A:Nobody just goes to a wedding anymore.
Speaker A:You get the text messages.
Speaker A:So where do you stand on the bridesmaid situation?
Speaker A:Man, I don't know.
Speaker A: and dance badly to songs from: Speaker A:I didn't really.
Speaker A:Only it's fascinating to me, though, that it's allegedly the fiance that's concerned.
Speaker A:Not the bride, her fiance.
Speaker A:Sir, this is a dangerous thing to say, because now every future disagreement is gonna start with, why didn't you take out the trash.
Speaker A:Uh, forgot.
Speaker A:Oh, that's interesting.
Speaker A:You had enough attention available to evaluate all the bridesmaids.
Speaker A:Yeah, good luck with that, buddy.
Speaker A:And this is sad, too, because you would think if a friendship survives 10 years, high school, relationships, life changes, all the ups and downs, you would think it would survive a wedding.
Speaker A:Or wedding photos.
Speaker A:It's amazing that it's wedding photos that finally break their friendship.
Speaker A:Not money, not politics, not borrowing clothes and never returning them.
Speaker A:And in the end, everyone loses.
Speaker A:The bride loses a best friend, the friend loses her chance to be a bridesmaid.
Speaker A:The guests, most importantly, lose access to the real story, because every person at the wedding wants to know the explanation.
Speaker A:Why isn't Sarah's best friend in the bridal party?
Speaker A:Well, apparently she was too attractive.
Speaker A:And at that point, every single guest would immediately turn around and try to figure out who it is they're talking about.
Speaker A:So how exactly did that plan to avoid attention work out for you kids?
