Episode 34
August 16, 2025 - This Week's Leftovers and a Song of Dangerous Throne Time
Get ready for a wild ride through the zany world of leftovers! We’re diving into the bits that didn’t quite make it to air this week—think of it as the ultimate snack pack of laughter. You know how life changes as we age? Yeah, we’re tackling that! I kicked things off with a hilarious take on how starting a movie at 7:30 PM feels like a Herculean task now that I’m not in my 20s anymore (seriously, who even thought that was okay?). And believe me, my money skills have leveled up—like, I’m almost a millionaire, just missing that pesky first digit! Plus, we’ve got brainy research on how sex lights up your noggin more than puzzles, which leads to some pretty awkward family visits. And let’s not forget about that Italian dude who survived two days with a crossbow bolt in his head—talk about a wild and crazy guy! Just when you thought it couldn’t get weirder, I bring up the new parenting trend of feeding babies meat—yep, carnivore babies are a thing now! It’s a buffet of giggles, puns, and a bit of wisdom about toilet scrolling dangers. So, grab your favorite snack and let’s munch on some laughs!
Takeaways:
- As we age, our movie-watching habits change; 7:30pm is now a bedtime, not a movie time!
- Who knew that sexual activity activates more brain regions than solving puzzles? Grandma, stick to Sudoku!
- Prolonged toilet scrolling can have some scary health risks, like UTIs and hemorrhoids. Yikes!
- The latest trend: Parents are feeding their babies meat, calling them carnivore babies. Can you say 'meat baby'?
- A guy in Italy survived two days with a crossbow in his head. Talk about a wild story!
- My therapist mentioned the elephant in the room about body confidence. Time to find a new therapist!
Transcript
It's time for some leftovers, some thoughts and jokes and bits that I either didn't get to this week or that I thought were a little too edgy.
Speaker A:I started to watch that new Mission Impossible movie last night and I realized what the biggest difference is as we age.
Speaker A:Because I started to watch this movie and I looked at the clock and it's 7:30.
Speaker A:And I thought, man, I can't start a movie now.
Speaker A:It's already 7:30.
Speaker A:And I chuckled.
Speaker A:When I was in my 20s, my.
Speaker B:Thought would have been, well, as long.
Speaker A:As I'm in bed by 3am I'll be all right.
Speaker A:And now I can't start a movie.
Speaker A:It's already 7:30.
Speaker A:Life changes a lot with each decade that goes by.
Speaker A:One thing that has not changed for me is I'm not great with money.
Speaker A:But I am better.
Speaker A:I'm better with money now than I was in my 30s and much better than I was in my 20s.
Speaker A:I'm actually getting really, really close to becoming a millionaire.
Speaker A:I've got all the zeros now.
Speaker A:I just need the one.
Speaker A:Researchers have said that sexual activity activates more regions in the brain than doing puzzles.
Speaker A:Which sounds pretty great until you think about it and you realize, yeah, I think I'd rather Grandma and Grandpa stick with Sudoku when I'm around to visit.
Speaker A:A A man in Italy survived two days with a crossbow arrow in his head.
Speaker A:It's amazing.
Speaker A:And yes, police described him as a wild and crazy guy.
Speaker A:And some of you'll love that that reference.
Speaker A:There is a I talked about this earlier in the week on the station, actually.
Speaker A:There's a new trend where parents feed their babies a diet of meat as soon as they're able to eat solid foods.
Speaker A:And they're calling them carnivore babies.
Speaker A:Can you imagine when Gerber comes out with Gerber dum dum dum we have the meat.
Speaker A:So silly rabbits in Colorado are growing these bony protrusions from their heads as if rabbits need to add to their reputation for being horny.
Speaker A:And lastly, I saw a therapist about my body confidence.
Speaker A:She mentioned the elephant in the room.
Speaker A:How brutal.
Speaker A:I think I need to find a new therapist.
Speaker A:There's an article in the Independent, which is a British magazine or website, and it talks about the health risks associated with toilet scrolling.
Speaker A:Toilet doom scrolling.
Speaker A:When you just sit there and scroll on the phone while sitting on the throne.
Speaker A:And this doom scrolling compulsively consuming negative news online has become a really scary thing.
Speaker A:And this, this, this person writes this article, shares her personal experience talking about developing a UTI due to extended toilet sessions, and doctors are warning that prolonged sitting on the toilet can cause physical issues urinary tract infections, which of course one of the potential complications from that if it goes untreated is sepsis.
Speaker A:Other issues from prolonged throne setting include hemorrhoids and a weakened pelvic floor, incontinence, prolapse, insomnia, anxiety and depression.
Speaker A:So be careful.
Speaker A:Do not just grab yourself a cell phone and sit on the toilet and scroll and scroll forever.
Speaker A:There are some dangerous health side effects.
Speaker A:It's not good for you physically or.
Speaker B:Ment Every morning straight away grab my phone and start my day Put the seat down, sit my butt down and begin to scroll the anger rises as I'm sitting Seconds later I start twitching losing my cool inaccessible ruled by bots and trolls A warring earth Taiwan Epstein files they're still gone Crypto Palestine, you'll lose your job too AI keyboard cowards dumb memes Sydney Sweeney's got good genes Covid's a hoax Diversity bitch about the airline Morning toilet doom scrolling Elbows on my knees while I check my feet Morning toilet doom scrolling get the latest news while I drop a deuce and Morning toilet doom scrolling My legs go numb because I can't get enough Morning toilet doom scrolling get in a crappy mood before my work commute.
