Episode 414
Your Friendly Reminder: It's National Junk Food Day!
Get ready to indulge, because today is National Junk Food Day, and it’s about time we celebrated our true culinary loves! I mean, who needs kale when you’ve got Crunchwraps and nacho fries calling your name? Let’s be real—nobody's backing out of a Taco Bell drive-thru just because their moral compass is tingling! This day is all about keeping it 100% honest with ourselves: junk food is our jam, and it’s time to embrace that greasy goodness like the old friends they are. So grab your favorite snacks and let’s toast to a day where guilt takes a backseat, and flavor rides shotgun! And don’t worry—if you’ve got leftovers, just call 1-800-GOT-JUNK-FOOD, and we’ll handle it like pros.
Takeaways:
- National Junk Food Day is the perfect excuse to indulge without guilt—what's better than that?
- We all have our junk food weaknesses, whether it’s chips, pizza rolls, or leftover pizza from last night.
- Kale had its chance, but let’s be real, Oreos are the real MVPs of snack time.
- This is the one day we can admit that junk food is a lifestyle, not just a treat.
- Forget nutrition for a day—let’s celebrate the snacks that bring us pure joy and messy fingers!
- If you’ve got leftover snacks, don’t hoard them—call 1-800-GOT junk food and let the feast begin!
Transcript
It's haystack.
Speaker A:And today is somehow National Junk Food Day, which is odd.
Speaker A:I thought it was October 31st, but it's great because I was already planning to observe it.
Speaker A:Accidentally, of course.
Speaker A:It's the one day of the year where we're supposed to pretend that junk food is a holiday instead of a lifestyle choice that we've worshiped since middle school.
Speaker A:And I love the idea of guilt free junk food.
Speaker A:As if guilt is what's stopping us.
Speaker A: at a Taco Bell drive thru at: Speaker A:No, we're getting the Crunchwrap and the nacho fries and then telling ourselves the Diet Coke cancels out the rest of the receipt.
Speaker A:The best junk food, though, is never elegant.
Speaker A:It's never on a plate.
Speaker A:It's never locally sourced.
Speaker A:It comes in a bag that makes a lot of noise and leaves dust on your fingers and has ingredients that sound like rejected Marvel villains.
Speaker A:And we all have at least one weakness.
Speaker A:Chips, candy, pizza rolls, gas station donuts, Little Debbie cold leftover fries that you eat over the sink like a raccoon with a mortgage.
Speaker A:National Junk Food Day is not about nutrition.
Speaker A:It's about honesty.
Speaker A:For one day, we admit that kale had its chance and that Oreos made a better argument.
Speaker A:So enjoy National Junk Food Day.
Speaker A:Enjoy it responsibly, of course.
Speaker A:Or I guess, irresponsibly if you're near a comfortable chair.
Speaker A:This National Junk Food Day, clear out all the snacks you didn't scarf down and call 1-800-GOT junk food.
Speaker A:Just point and our team of fat guys will gobble it all up.
Speaker A:Twinkies, potato chips, even leftover pizza.
Speaker A:It tastes even better the next day.
Speaker A:Don't let those fattening treats in your pantry tempt you.
Speaker A:Mmm.
Speaker A:Cool Ranch Doritos, My favorite.
Speaker A:When National Junk Food Day is over, get back on your diet with our help.
Speaker A:We drank all the soda and we're about done with the freezer, ma'.
Speaker A:Am.
Speaker A:Just waiting for my guy's ice cream headache to go away.
Speaker A:Don't leave your refrigerator cluttered with calories.
Speaker A:Call 1-800- Got junk food today.
