Episode 408
Morning 6-Pack - The Robot Teacher's Top 6 Human Tricks
School's about to get a little more sci-fi, folks! A school district in western New York is bringing in a humanoid robot teacher named Sally, because apparently, kids don't have enough to stress about already. With lifelike silicone skin and a knack for remembering lessons, Sally's here to "help," or at least that's what we’re told before she starts telling kids they can’t use the bathroom unless they ask politely. In this week’s Morning 6-Pack, we’re counting down the top six things Sally should be programmed to do to fit right in with those human teachers we all know and love (or love to complain about). Spoiler alert: it involves a side hustle that might surprise you! Tune in for some giggles, a dash of sarcasm, and a whole lot of fun as we navigate this wild new world of educational robots!
Takeaways:
- A school in New York is bringing in a robot teacher named Sally, which is kinda wild.
- Sally's designed to help students, but her presence raises a few eyebrows, right?
- The kids will identify themselves by number, which feels like we're heading into a sci-fi movie.
- The company behind Sally has links to something called 'real doll', making things even weirder.
- Of course, Sally should be programmed to do all the classic teacher things, like whining about pay!
- The episode wraps up with a hilarious take on how Sally could totally have an OnlyFans.
Transcript
Its haystack in a school district in western New York is bringing in a humanoid robot teacher this fall because apparently the children weren't already anxious enough from the math and the fire drills and whatever's happening in the cafeteria.
Speaker A:The robot's name is Sally, and she has lifelike silicone skin, long brown hair, facial expressions, upper body movement.
Speaker A:And she'll sit in the classroom providing support, which is always how the robots start, isn't it?
Speaker A:Oh, don't worry.
Speaker A:She's only here to help.
Speaker A:Next thing you know, your kid's asking permission to use the bathroom from a seated mannequin with wi fi.
Speaker A:And Sally is apparently not replacing the human teacher.
Speaker A:She's there to help with lessons and to remember where students left off and to even interject if the teacher forgets something.
Speaker A:Oh, teachers are going to love that.
Speaker A:Nothing says professional respect like a six digit robot jumping in with.
Speaker A:Well, actually, Linda, you skipped fractions.
Speaker A:Beep beep, boop.
Speaker A:Sally's not going to use student names either.
Speaker A:The kids will identify themselves by number.
Speaker A:Hi, Ms. Sally.
Speaker A: I'm student number: Speaker A:That's not school.
Speaker A:That's the opening scene of a dystopian horror movie.
Speaker A:And then the favorite detail, the company behind Sally is connected to something called real doll, even though they insist there's no overlap with real doll.
Speaker A:And in case you're wondering, real doll is for knocking boots and behind closed doors.
Speaker A:Yeah, great.
Speaker A:Perfect.
Speaker A:Wonderful.
Speaker A:Just what every parent wants.
Speaker A:A school newsletter that has to give the disclaimer good news.
Speaker A:The robot teacher is not from the robot sex doll department.
Speaker A:Although, since it's not in the classroom yet, I thought we could maybe come up with some ideas.
Speaker A:Some things the robot teacher should be programmed to do so that it's just like every human teacher.
Speaker A:Best way to start your day.
Speaker A:These six jokes he's about to say, listen up for old haystack.
Speaker A:Crack open the morning six pack again.
Speaker A:These are the top six things the robot teacher should be programmed to do, so it's just like every human teacher.
Speaker A:Number six, drink at recess.
Speaker A:Number five, whine about their paycheck.
Speaker A:Four, make it a movie day when they don't feel like working.
Speaker A:Three, pass the dumb kids on to the next grade so they don't have to deal with them anymore.
Speaker A:Number two, kill the class goldfish instead of keeping it over the summer.
Speaker A:And the number one thing the robot teacher should be programmed to do.
Speaker A:So it's just like every human teacher is have a side hustle on only fans.
