Episode 310
Deep Breaths & Email Stress: A Survival Guide! š§āāļø
Yo, folks! Ever heard of email apnea? No, it's not some fancy yoga moveāit's that wild moment when you totally stop breathing while reading an email! I mean, come on, who hasn't felt like they were facing a bear when they see a subject line that says "just checking in"? It's like a mini heart attack every time! We dive into why our bodies freak out over emails and even texts, giving us headaches and jaw clenching like weāre solving a murder mystery while logging into Outlook. But donāt sweat it! Iāve got a chill tip to help you breathe easy before you tackle those inbox monsters. Buckle up and laugh along with us as we tackle the absurdity of our digital lives!
Takeaways:
- Ever heard of email apnea? Yeah, it's when you hold your breath reading emailsālike, what?
- I swear, every time I see 'just checking in,' my heart races like I saw a bear!
- Emails are the new scary monsters under the bedāwho knew?
- Pro tip: Before you dive into emails, take a deep breathāyour shoulders will thank you!
- No one ever sends an email saying 'great news, nothing's required from you'āthatās just a fairy tale!
- Seriously, if you feel like you're solving a murder while checking emails, you might have email apnea!
Transcript
Good morning.
Speaker A:It's Haystack.
Speaker A:Here's a fascinating new thing.
Speaker A:Email apnea.
Speaker A:Have you ever noticed that when you read an email, it feels kind of dangerous?
Speaker A:Way more dangerous than it should.
Speaker A:There is this thing that's being called email apnea, where you stop breathing while you read emails.
Speaker A:Which explains a lot, because every time I see an email with a subject line that says, just checking in, my body reacts like I've encountered a bear.
Speaker A:I don't even open the email right away.
Speaker A:I just kind of stare at it first.
Speaker A:Hi.
Speaker A:Why are you saying hi like that?
Speaker A:What did I do wrong?
Speaker A:Experts are saying that we unconsciously hold our breath while reading emails.
Speaker A:Yeah, of course we do.
Speaker A:Half the emails start with per my last email.
Speaker A:That's not a sentence, that's a threat.
Speaker A:And it's apparently not just emails.
Speaker A:They say it happens while texting and scrolling socials too.
Speaker A:Which makes sense because I swear I can spend 20 minutes on social media without breathing one time.
Speaker A:At this point, my lungs think that Instagram is an underwater sport.
Speaker A:The funny part about it is that our bodies interpret incoming emails.
Speaker A:And I'm not making this up like a threat.
Speaker A:And our body's not completely wrong.
Speaker A:Nobody's ever sent an email that says, great news.
Speaker A:Nothing is required from you.
Speaker A:It's always quick question.
Speaker A:No, it's never quick.
Speaker A:Or.
Speaker A:Can you take a look at this?
Speaker A:Let me translate that for you.
Speaker A:Congratulations.
Speaker A:This is your problem now.
Speaker A:And you do get physical symptoms from this.
Speaker A:Email apnea.
Speaker A:You get headaches, muscle tension, jaw clenching.
Speaker A:That's why every office worker looks like they're trying to solve a murder.
Speaker A:While opening Outlook.
Speaker A:The solution is simple, though.
Speaker A:Before you read an email, before you even open an email, take a slow breath out and relax your shoulders.
Speaker A:And I've been trying it, and it actually works.
Speaker A:I can now calmly open messages and read things like circling breath, circling back.
Speaker A:Oh, okay.
Speaker A:Deep breath, following up.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Friendly reminder.
Speaker A:Oh, no, I'm holding my breath again.
Speaker A:Those are never actually friendly.
