Episode 134
Alabama Bama on Buying Greenland: Trailer Dreams & Sausage Schemes!
Alabama Bama's got some serious thoughts on US politics—kinda! While she may not be glued to CNN, she can totally relate to the buzz about the US wanting to buy Greenland. Why? Because she's on a mission to buy a trailer from her neighbor Cheryl to turn it into the ultimate hair salon/sausage house combo! Yep, you heard that right! Picture this: haircuts with a side of sausage. Bama made Cheryl a deal she thought was *chef's kiss*—700 bucks and a sausage punch card! But Cheryl slammed the door in her face because she's been dreaming about Bret Michaels swooping in to rescue her ever since 1987. Talk about delusional optimism! Bama's not backing down, though. She's got a world leader's spirit, and she's determined to make that trailer hers, no matter what!
Transcript
Good morning, it's Haystack.
Speaker B:Pretty much my favorite time of the week when we get to chat with my dear old friend Bama down in rural Alabama.
Speaker B:And she's joining us on the phone this morning.
Speaker B:And, Bama, there's been some talk in the news recently about the US Wanting to buy Greenland.
Speaker B:Have you been following all that stuff?
Speaker A:Oh, hey, Stack, I ain't keeping up with no news, but Verna did tell me about it, and honestly, I can kind of relate.
Speaker B:You.
Speaker B:You relate to wanting to buy Greenland?
Speaker A:Well, yeah, I'm in a real similar situation.
Speaker A:I've been trying to buy Cheryl's trailer so I can turn it into a hair salon slash sausage house, and she is not having it.
Speaker B:Oh, a sausage house, of course.
Speaker A:I mean, I made her a fair offer, too.
Speaker A:700 bucks and first access to the sausage punch card.
Speaker A:Buy 10 links, get one free.
Speaker A:Now that's value, Haystack.
Speaker B:Wait, she still said no?
Speaker A:Yeah, she did.
Speaker A:And you want to know why?
Speaker A: n mail to Bret Michaels since: Speaker B:Wow.
Speaker B:Now that.
Speaker B:That's optimism.
Speaker A:Yes, Delulu is what it is, Haystack.
Speaker A:It's straight Delulu.
Speaker A:I told her, cheryl, you cannot fix stupid, but you can fix split ends.
Speaker A:And she slammed the door on me.
Speaker B:So there's no deal then?
Speaker A:Well, no, not yet, but I ain't gonna give up.
Speaker A:World leaders don't quit, and I don't neither.
Speaker B:Well, you got anything else on your agenda, Madam Secretary of Sausage?
Speaker A:Well, I need to go rotate my meats, actually.
Speaker A:You leave them sitting too long and things get dangerous.
Speaker B:Well, that sounds like solid advice.
Speaker B:In more ways than one.
Speaker B:I appreciate you chatting with us this morning.
Speaker B:I better get and pay some bills.
Speaker B:Have a great day.
Speaker A:Anytime, sugar.
Speaker A:Y' all have a good day.
